my thoughts were so loud i couldn't hear my mouth.

lately:

there are some serious scumbags around this town.

graduation is literally right around the corner

1/2 way closes Sunday.

i can't WAIT to move January 1st.

though it is taking way too long to launch, In The Backpack should launch for the New Year.... Just so many ideas cropping up!

my digital camera started working again for the time being, thank fucking god. now i have another hobby i can do that just makes me push other people away even harder

i don't think people read this anymore.

it's good that i don't write in it as much.

if people knew how little i really cared for everything they'd probably be pretty worried/angry.

i'm just literally so fucking frustrated with everyone that i can't talk to anyone.

i've never been so angry at everything i look at.

another night.

i've been seriously slacking lately.
on like everything.
i'm always busy but like, there's so much i haven't gotten to do this summer.
got a new SD card though. cool to take pictures again.
playing a show friday with my brother's band(s?) and other local bands.
www.PerilliStock.com






maybe it's not all so bad.
everyone,
sorry about everything.
i don't know i'm gonna go play guitar,
i need to write a happy song.

....

i'm absolutely petrified.
photo's soon.

it's late i'm rambling i'm sorry.

but i can't even write the words to try to capture how i'm feeling
and you don't even know what you'd say if you could open up your mouth.
i've hated myself for the longest time.

it all fell apart after the accident.
i saw entire cities crumbling into dirt
i saw ______, ___ and _______.
and i saw the ocean and couldn't separate it from the skyline.

what if,
all
of
a
sudden,
everything just fucking glitched on you?
and you weren't sure of anything
but
knew
what
was there?

somewhere, though, i AM sure and
i DO remember that little girl you were, picking blueberries with me
laughing in the mirror
and placing clouds in the sky.
i'm so sure of this, and nothing but this.
do i need to know anything but this?




i understand i understand HOLY SHIT I UNDERSTAND FINALLY why you love'd that room so damn much.
and why you said it gave you the best sleep ever.
and how you never wanted to wake up again.
holy fucking shit.

do metaphors scare you?
1/2 way.
lucky 3.
my eyes are changing colors again.
oh my god.
fuck this shit.

And all I saw were fireworks.

I should really get on that camera thing.

Played at the Halfway Cafe for Taylor's 21st birthday the other night, good crew showed up holla atcha boy.
Taylor had fun and everyone got fed and it was rad.
Pictures probably never?

Oh and then BBT shared this link on my Facebook, I was quoted in the ledger for not buying a laptop at Bridgewater State College. Ghetto life. Big-ups to my 2GB flash-drive.

College laptop program costs too much money, experts say - Quincy, MA - The Patriot Ledger

Off to work, later!

i can't keep doing this to myself.

All that I had, but I dropped. (and P.S. I can't believe what you did...)

can't sleep again, lame. update this stuff I guess.

in addition to trying to work on a million other things as well, i really need to start making a blog with purpose. i've been kind of strapped for brain-storming, but anyone who actually reads this, feel free to let me know how you feel about this idea...

Since losing my SD card a few weeks ago I haven't been able to take pictures. Although I definitely have the money right now for one, anyone who knows me knows I'm a cheap bastard and will legitimately make-do with anything I have to avoid buying new shit. My back-up SD card is only 16mb, and I was quite shocked to find it can only hold 4 pictures. For blogs sake, I figured I would try to take the misfortune of losing my SD card and try to turn it into something positive. I'm thinking of possibly starting a daily (hopefully, or possibly weekly) blog where I can only upload 4 pictures a day. I'd tell a story with them and try to fill in gaps, which would give me a chance to work on my writing skills. I don't know, it's an idea, but I really need to start legit working on a website or something for when I graduate and get to big-people world. this new blog would probably be on my more business-friendly WordPress (JamieThomasLong.WordPress.com).


I'm excited to play this Friday night at Halfway Cafe for Taylor's 21st birthday. Seriously, if you're 21, please come, we'd all love to see you. Free appetizers. Wii sports will start around 9 or so for anyone who wants to play, appetizers will come out a short while later, then I'll probably start playing music around 9:45.

I played a small show at James the other night, it was fun. Meaghan Casey took some rad pictures, as seen below. I'm excited for Perilli Stock in August as well, it's Friday the 13th. Come, it's seriously a killer time. There will be a whole bunch of bands spanning many genres of music, lots of people go, there's a pool and always mad food.

I seriously love playing music in front of people but truth be told it's fucking scary as shit. While playing music is my hobby, Communications is my major and I've done tons of public speaking stuff. I feel like I should be a little more easy about it, but seriously I feel like freaking out every time.
People tell me I'm good at it, and even today A friend of mine told me, "I really think you should speak at [this thing]....You're extremely well-spoken, you can make people laugh, you tell stories well...."

I just feel that lately everytime I go to open my mouth nothing comes out.

it's getting better all the time.

what a mess I make.

Totally weird vibes lately:
1) I work too much but I'm stacking money.
2) I can't figure out where I want to live when I graduate (or perhaps next semester), at all.
3) I'm scared sometimes that I'm keeping too close all the things I shouldn't.
4) I need to start practicing and figuring out songs for Taylor's birthday bash on the 16th.
5) I legit almost got raped.
6) I need to have more full-band shit ready for the Perilli's party on Friday the 13th. Mids Kids official debut. (whaat?)
7) I'm up too early and gooning all over again.
8) I make too many posts where I list things.



Lately, it's hard to play certain songs I've written live.....actually, a lot of them. I've heard certain recording artists feel the same way, you know? Having to re-live all the painful memories in front of people every time they play. I guess I don't know. I mean, I just never thought I'd have the same issue. It's just more difficult knowing certain things lack conclusion, as well as plenty of things I'm always trying to work out. But some nights, when it feels right and I can't take all this frustration out anywhere else, there's some sort of comfort in screaming the songs. It sounds lame now, but it's sort of like a release I guess. Or is it relapse?


Maybe I just need to write a happy song or something. That might make me and anybody who has to listen to me bitch feel 1000x better. I'm gonna try to get off this and catch some more zzzz's before work.

Considering I don't have a cell-phone and am impossible to get in touch with

New plan:
Borrow people's phones to "make quick calls" at parties/public settings, text message pictures of myself in said location to random friends to let them know I'm thinking of them. Feel free to upload pictures, or upgrade your data plans.


That's it for today, Happy 4th!

And suddenly I knew what I had to do.

Now that makes sense.





I'm gonna get the money I'm gonna get the money I'm gonna get the money and fucking run for my life.

I'm gonna stay up all night, every night, for the rest of my life.

Whew, just got back from Quincy.



Today I played a show at the Marshfield Yacht Club for the "Blessing of the Fleet" with Craig. While old people and little children are not my usual demographic, some rad friends showed up who I haven't seen in abit, so it was nice. They were also offering me mad free beer, which was very nice. Then I had work, whateverrrr. Made some money, that was good. Went to Mad Fish after to play some songs. So rad to not be in earlier said demographic but with so many of the same people. Degust and Mary came so that was awesome. I love them, seriously. My friends mean the world to me.


Lately I've been gooning for legit no reason. I just feel like this is neither the time nor place for it. Even though it's probably both. It sucks when there's all this shit that you can't even tell your best friends. It's kind of like this massive secret that I can't talk about. I don't even think I'd want to if someone asked me about it. Ahhh just so much inside....ughhh.


But from the other side of things I'm allowed to goon out about:
This random other girl is seriously creeping me THE FUCK OUT.
Like, if I even told you, you wouldn't believe me.
It's fuuuuucking ridiculous.
I don't even know why I wrote that, but honestly....it's so bad I don't want to talk about it.



I really do need to get my SD card or borrow someones. I figure maybe if I take some pictures I should stop bitching on this thing. God damn the Jam, 2010. Sorry guys. Fuck me, if you don't kill me.

Say yes....

I just stumbled upon this poem I wrote oh so many years ago. Baby, do you remember me now?



It's interesting enough:
When the subject of love comes up
people are so quick to talk.
When the subject of death comes up
no one can say a fucking thing.
The weirdest thing is:
One only happens to some of us
and one happens to all of us.

From what I HAVE learned:
When you're dead you don't come back to talk to your best friend.
You don't have control of your mother's brakes before the accident.
A warm September wind is not fingertips on your lover's face.
The 100 grand you spent on college doesn't pay you back.
God doesn't even know who you are,
let alone shake your hand.


But what's left:
Passing your drivers test.
Your first time.
A sunset in California.
And her hair,
long as the summer
and the scent it left on your pillow,
and the long days in highschool waiting for it.

Let's Get Nice.

This website/blog is going to be going through some serious changes, all of which I will be finalizing soon.

Basically, I want to run this blog in a new format from now on.

Each week (ideally), I will post 2 videos:
1) Doing something nice for someone else.
2) Playing a new song.

I will try to film the songs whenever the occasion arises, and it would be preferable to have some sort of audience (friends/party/open mic's/woods/I honestly don't care). Cover requests are plenty more than welcome. If anyone is down for this, let me know. It'd probably just be short videos on my digital camera.

I mean, I will definitely still be posting my weird ass ramblings in this thing, but I want to promote the idea of playing music for friends, promote my own music, and also just the idea that you can have a good time and do good things for people.


I don't know, let me know what you think, if anyone even sees or reads this.
There will obviously be shameless self-promotion through FaceBook.
And thank you to everyone who come to open mic's to see me.
And thank you to Nick for helping me record.
I don't know, thanks everyone.

i meant every word i'd sung for you.

oh man

and i used to think people who wrote concept albums were cool...



if i even told anyone all the weird shit i'm thinking all the time they'd think i'm crazy.
all i see are these ridiculous metaphors...i don't know.
i'm getting pretty fucking nervous to tell you the truth.



who am i even talking to?

right ahead, young sailor!!!

...well, that felt good.

humidity.

skateboarding today, beach if this heat blows.
prah some grill thrown in there too.


weird life.

you can change it all if you want to.

i stopped by this apt the other day and was smoking a blunt and some mother came in WITH HER ONE YEAR OLD BOY IN A STROLLER to buy something off this kid and then she started hitting the blunt in front of her baby boy.


feeling pretty badly about life right now.
seriously, that's not fucking cool at all.

Regardless of not having a cell phone...

Did you think that maybe there's a reason we don't stay in touch?
Like, if I try calling you and we hang out, obviously it means I care enough to.
and I used to, I really did.
But did you ever think there's a direct correlation between how you acted how you did and why I don't call you anymore?










fuuuuuuck dude, get me back to the city.

this circle will never be broken.

Jon & Christine are getting married. He gave her the ring and they're planning on next summer or something. I'm really happy for them and so so so excited. He's been one of my best friends for my entire life. And though I just met her about a year ago when they started seeing each other, Christine is a super great girl for him. I trust in their decision, and I'm pumped considering they're like my first friends to get hitched.
AND JON O AND MYSELF ARE THE "BEST MEN".
FUCK YES.
BEST FRIENDS FOREVER!





bryan salmon has remained one of my tightest friends i feel like for quite some time. i don't know, he's just a good kid and when i'm bummed he is good at spreading cheer. i don't know, all of my friends are far too nice to me. seriously, thank you all.

i think i lost my SD card the other day. lame, i need to either track down where my clever niece/cousin hid it or pick a new one up.

i'm about to beat a GameBoy game i bought in roughly the 6th grade. so weird, i don't know....
i've also been re-reading Interpreter of Maladies, which I haven't even looked at in like 4 years. it's actually pretty good.

random, but have you heard the phrase "a man is as good as his tools" (or something like that?)
i've been thinking about it for awhile, and i totally believe it.
i mean, given the medium, i feel like i could accomplish so much, i just never have the time.
it's like, i love skateboarding, i love guitar, i like working, i love taking pictures, writing songs...fuck, i mean i even tried knitting over the winter and am attempting to grow strawberries right now.

it's strange, i just have this desire to learn as much as possible so i can keep myself occupied and be productive in as many different things i can cram in my head....which is great, but i guess sometimes i feel like i don't get to totally realize my full potential in any one single area.
oh well, i guess there's always room for improvement.


sometimes i don't know how to act. i secretly do miss you sometimes, but of course i'm going to be bitter. i have every right in the world to be. you would be too, i'm sure. i fear already that this is going to be received the wrong way and maybe by the wrong person. probably by the wrong person. ugh vague life.
it's late, i'm clearly rambling.
i can't even go on the computer without all these painful images.

and i wanted to hurt all the shit-talkers.

i swear to god i never believed anyone but you i swear to god i never believed anyone but you i swear to god i never believed anyone but you i swear to god i never believed anyone but you i swear to god i never believed anyone but you i swear to god i never believed anyone but you i swear to god i never believed anyone but you i swear to god i never believed anyone but you i swear to god i never believed anyone but you i swear to god i never believed anyone but you i swear to god i never believed anyone but you i swear to god i never believed anyone but you i swear to god i never believed anyone but you i swear to god i never believed anyone.

karma, so hard.

Damn it seems like it's been a bit but everything at this point is just kind of blurring.

Work, work, work and trying to stack $$.
and I (usually) always get to see my friends there!
raaad.

KARMA:
Yesterday I was serving these three dudes inside the restaurant (Chris, Jon, Tim?), just talking to them mad long and stuff, they seemed like good guys. then they asked of they could go out to the biker function on the patio. local bikers were having a fundraiser for their friend who was paralyzed from the neck-down in a motorcycle accident. they were selling t-shirts and raffle tickets for prizes such as laptops, scratch tickets, etc. I'm just shooting the shit with one of the dudes (Chris) actually ends up winning $250 in the raffle, and then donated it back to the family/charity to get them through all this. They invite me out to have a beer with them, and then ask if i wanna go to (yuck) the roadhouse. We get there to watch the Lakers/Celts and they're buying me some beers and it's nice. Fucking Chris hits for $450 on a scratch ticket and just buys us all a bunch of shots/beer/keno tickets. I don't know, but unless he's just really lucky, i feel like it had something to do with giving the money back to that family.

i feel like i notice this kind of stuff all the time.
i mean, even when shit goes wrong, all you can really do is be the nicest person you can.
i think i get along pretty well with everyone, and these past 2 years i feel like the biggest weight has been lifted off my head. i'm in a much better spot, now, and it's so nice.


I have some of the best friends i could have ever asked for, and i hope they know how much they mean to me.



i'm opening tomorrow, so i'm gonna go to bed now. it's late. goodnight!

Follow Mike and Trevor on their trip across the U.S.

My friends Mike and Trevor from school have started their (roughly) 7 week stint across the United States. They embarked yesterday in a Ford Focus in what should be the trip of a life-time. The road-trip will take them across 14 national parks including Yellowstone, Death Valley, Redwood, and the Grand Canyon. Largely a camping-trip, this 10,000 mile journey is being funded by Bridgewater State College's ATP grant. Best of luck, and a safe return to the both of them.

Follow Mike here:
http://knotsandcasualties.tumblr.com/

and Trevor here:
http://www.notanothercollegeblog.blogspot.com/


Also, I may consider switching "Let's Get Nice" over to WordPress.
I kind of like the layout I have going on for my more "professional" website:
http://JamieThomasLong.wordpress.com

STRANDED KIDS.

mids,
rum,
beach forever.

I shamed my father & I scared my family.

I probably look like a pretty big coward right now.



Sorry.

keep the things you forgot.

I am up way too early to have nothing to do today.
early bird mug was delicious, though.

I'm gonna pass back out for awhile I think.
I hope I do something exciting today.
Offer: I think I will chop an L down with the first person to show up at my house and wake me up.


Yes, yes.

Drinking away the part of the day that I cannot sleep away.

i have like a 80/20 good friend/shitty friend ratio.
it kinda sucks but it's been worse i guess.
or better.
it could always be better.


ahhhh fuck off everyone i'm going to the beach.

Auditioning my escape plan

Feels like a tequila-lemonade sorta day.
Beach or skatepark....or both.
Probably both.


Works easy, everyone I work with rules, and I am starting to stack some dough.
This summer is going to be awesome, I can already tell.
Only gotta take 4 classes Fall semester and I'm gone!
Shit's so surreal!


However, all the things I can't and shouldn't say about my life, I won't,
and I'm gonna finish Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey now.

Here, I love this song.

So I inhale & exhale as best as I can but I donated my lungs to the Marlboro man.

Let's see....

Yesterday was rad, went to 2mile with Keeefth, Jon, and Matt.
Grilled/chilled on the dock.
Then I got my car some oil and a filter so I can change that up.
Got myself some paint and white-t's so I could put these two new beauties together.
$10 if you want one, get at me with sizes and shit.





Also, I'm going to be recording and doing a project this summer with Nick Asta.
Check out some of his rough demo's at http://www.myspace.com/mgunk
Honestly, I couldn't be more excited for this.
It's hard to find people who share the same sort of direction I want to take my music in, and I think Nick and I will be able to make some great things.

Summer of Drugs 2010.

re: Life.

I'm sorry for these past few months.
I'll go back to being myself soon, I promise.
Someone, please hold me to that and turn me back to that kid I was.



For now: mids.




i hope it breaks your heart when you realize what you missed.

Everything fucking sucks.

peace.

Never stop doing what you love.

Jon holding it down for Nate's deck-to-deck transfer.
Photo: Courtney Lauretano.
Quincy, MA

some drunken bruises you woke up and thought were stigmata.

"we can relate...but i feel you, i look forward to talking and bein with ya....its easy to be around you"

it's good to have a girl-friend(s) to be able to talk with

someone who knows what i'm saying without judging and can offer useful advice about everything before my chest caves in.

sounds about right.

"They come here alone and they leave in two's,
except for you and me, who just came to use.
If you're all done like you said you'd be
what're you doing hanging out with me?"
-Whatever (Some Folk Song in C), Elliott Smith.

I don't know what it is, but lately I just feel so angry.
But kind of like, sad-angry.
Does that even make sense?

Who cares if you lose all your money if you're having this much fun?

Sometimes when I'm bummed or whatever, I just put on this song by my friend Sam's band, Kitchen Jams. I met Sam doing this song acoustic at a Bridgewater Open Mike last semester and really haven't been able to get it out of my head since. Maybe it'll cheer someone else up. I think these are all the lyrics to it, and a link to their myspace.

"Good Mood"
www.myspace.com/kitchenjams


"Well, I'm cruising through my life with the top rolled back,
like I'm riding shot-gun in my best-friends Cadillac, '84 El Dorado, like I'm 18 years old.

I'm at a great point in my life, I'm completely free. Not too many things are holding onto me, there ain't nothing that could hold me down.
Well, if I wanted I could leave right now, and if I wanted I'd have left by now.

I'm in a great, great mood.
A great mood.

Then I call up all my buddies just to spread my cheer,
said 'Boys come home and drink'
they said 'we're already here at that same old place'.

With all the friends that we've made,
and all the money that we threw away on things like:
females, cigarettes, cars, and booze,
gasoline and poker games,
whose gonna lose all their money?
Who cares if you lose all your money when you're having this much fun?

I'm in a great mood, a great mood.
Why should I spend all my time singing about them blues?
About a dark cloud, a rainy day, a leaky roof are all the things that I hate,
when this mood I can not shake.

Well, I call up all my boys then I call up my girls,
we'll party all night like it's the end of the world.
We're not going to bed at 3, not me, not us, that's just too early.

Oh well, I've got that love on my side,
to keep me safe once my time's run dry.
You know, it's gonna run dry.

Oh well, I've got that love on my side,
to hold me close once my time's flown by.
You know, it's gonna fly by."

blueberries.

this is unreal.

Rounding up.

Who's got two thumbs and is done with finals Tuesday morning?
:::this guy:::
I wish I was graduating earlier than December.



I started working at the Halfway Cafe for the Summer.
I guess we will see.


Wow, everything is BEAT.
I should really start uploading more photos.
Shit, kid.

Current vices include:
Champagne
Skateboarding and song-writing keeping me away from Final's stuff.
Mids.
Pall mall menthol 100's
Adderall
Fun times.
Good rhymes.

Songs I want to Cover:
Sittin on a dock of the bay.
Stand By Me
and learn more of Angel in The Snow.



Word.

What I wouldn't give to be back in Quincy.

The holocaust beneath my ribs

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

If you were a telephone, you'd still be off the hook.

these past few days and nights have been strange

you don't even read this bullshit,
but i just want you to know that i would never ever hurt you.



it seems like every time i wanna talk i'd just hate everything i'd say.

Please don't leave me here.

Could I even feel worse?


(Copyright: not mine)

truth.

"That's the problem with drinking, I thought, as I poured myself a drink. If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen." -Charles Bukowski, Women

Oh life, what else could go wrong with you?

End of the semester is approaching and I have 145452521 things to do.

Possible ideas for summer 2010:
Get a working bicycle.
Move into $100 a month nook.
Empty swimming pool.
Get a steady job.
Alienate friends more than I already have.
Live in New Hampshire.
Lose steady job.
Record CD.
Make more clothes that only I wear.

"it feels good
to be driven about in a red
porsche
by a woman better-
read than I
am.
it feels good
to be driven about in a red
porsche
by a woman who can explain
things about
classical
music to
me.

it feels good
to be driven about in a red
porsche
by a woman who buys
things for my refrigerator
and my
kitchen:
cherries, plums, lettuce, celery,
green onions, brown onions,
eggs, muffins, long
chilis, brown sugar,
Italian seasoning, oregano, white
wine vinegar, pompeian olive oil
and red
radishes.

I like being driven about
in a red porsche
while I smoke cigarettes in
gentle languor.

I'm lucky. I've always been
lucky:
even when I was starving to death
the bands were playing for
me.
but the red porsche is very nice
and she is
too, and I've learned to feel good when
I feel good.

it's better to be driven around in a
red porsche
than to own
one. the luck of the fool is
inviolate."
-Charles Bukowski, The Red Porsche



Not exactly a Porsche, per say, but red, relative, and very nice to think of now when I am skipping out on sleep.

killer time.

Wednesday was Charlie's 21st birthday, so I went over to his house in Scituate and had a few. We drunkenly hooked up a fog machine.
"....hand me my shoe, I'm gonna puke!"



Thursday, my 8AM was cancelled and I didn't know until I got to school. Epicly lame. Failed important tests at school. Epicly lamer'd.

Went home, just to go back to escuela that night for Mikey P's 21st birthday bash at Crapo. Got to see some awesome people I haven't seen in quite some time. Steph and Derek also came by. Then the pigs showed up. fUcK tHa PoLiCe.

Friday Night went to Amherst with Gemelli and Hourihan to visit Michelle. Some kid freestyle rapped for us, and the ending rhyme words consisted of "Bug Light" and "Iiight". Do what you want with that.

Went to a party and Gemelli started spitting mad game at drunk girls.
Endless grill sesh, Endless 4AM Dominoes.

Skyped with Grimin' Fartlett.

Iain had a bash Saturday, and my camera got passed around.

There would be photos of this post and I'm sure there will be later for some that I didn't put on facebook. The photo-publishing thing isn't working right now.
LATER.

speeding up time (feeling alright.)

In SOMEWHAT of an order, here's a shot of life for you.

Just cruising around.

Trip to ghetto ass Hartford with John P/Doctor Nick Abela.


Backyard ramp 2010. Shit is "janky" but aren't we all? FIVE-OH! If this ramp survives summer I will be thoroughly impressed. Considering the run-up doubles as a fire-pit/cigarette/keg location, I guess we will see.


Pick-up baseball with a crew of randoms. I'm probably forgetting someone, but: Hart Bros/Brian/Pat McDonald/Courage/Hourihan/Matt Fogg/Brendan Hart/Steve Green/SLewis/Dan Chisolm/Tim Johnson/others? Comeback in the last inning, 23-19 but I'm not much for a score-keeper, opting to spit sunflower seeds and play catch on the sidelines.



Jaime Gill (left) and Wes(sp?). Funny story about my man on the right: we bumped into each other and I told him I vaguely remembered him from somewhere a long time ago. He told me at a party at the Shield's a few years ago, I traded him my Bacardi Razz t-shirt for his Jagermeister T-Shirt when we were cRuNk. Then I remembered. Radical!




HOLY SHIT WE CAN'T STOP LURKING.



(above 3) Meaghan Mullis was hammered and fell at Paul's, smashing a damn near full bottle of Southern Comfort and gashing her hand. No one had a problem drinking the glassy-SoCo, including my man Craig. Craig and I would later take a trip to southern Plymouth for a drive during our Spring Break. This dude-cruise consisted mainly of man-talk, pipe-tobacco, and cruising the "Great Island" apartment complexes. We also split a pizza and filled up on unlimited salad/rolls at Bertucci's, cause we're dating.



Lots of people came out for St. Patrick's Day/My Birthday. Chris Black and I are releasing an auto-tuned rap split. This stemmed from roughly 3 straight nights of relentlessly free-style rap battling against each other. MORE LATER ON THIS.



Iain and Brendan were in full-swing and looking gorgeous all weekend. Besides playing dick-tons of Beruit, I couldn't stop blabbing to Brendan how he was the "#1 ladies man". Intellectual, handsome, and surprisingly good on the basketball court, make sure to lock up your girlfriends.

keep them in your shirt.
more @
http://www.ToBeHonestIExpectedMore.com

Peace out, kids. Now that I have picture-uploading capability, everyone should be 1,000x more nervous.

RAD.

this is the best relapse i have ever known.
speeding my heart through night-time, oh so awful
so TERRIBLE when I found out who you made out with
and who put who's dick in who's mouth but
that doesn't really matter now, it's not all sosososo bad
but why can't I sneeze without blue flying all over the table?

Jealousy happens when
the percentage of what you know about someone
drops below the percentage
of what you DON'T know about someone.

My Pie charts and Linear graphs have been all over the place for awhile now
and are telling me that I know roughly 60-80 percent about
who you truly are
and how you did what you did
and why you did it
and how you can even breathe knowing about it
but I'm not jealous over what you have now.

Slope- Rise over run, or X over Y ( I think)
so I ask my Ex, "Why?
Why did you X me out like a pop-up
and run?"

I just realized how much I loved doing caps lock
to accentuate my POINTS but sometimes I'm not totally sure
anyone really gets it. Everything else is going well.
I have a superduperbigcrush(-eduppowder)
on some really pretty girl.
She's got a lot of your good traits and some bad traits,
but none of YOUR bad traits,
and that's enough for me.

What else is there?

Turned 22 yesterday. God damn. Went to Scituate with Taylor for a little, he got me an awesome gift and paid for breakfast at the Omelet Factory. Got some other rad gifts from my family. Was going to pre-game and go to Bridgewater. Never made it that far. Tons of good awesome friends though. Got into some conversations I shouldn't have with people I shouldn't have, but overall a very great time. Pictures soon, when I get somewhere with an SD slot.

Chris Black, I found out you read this, and you were killing it on the rap freestyle battle scene these past few nights. Keep it up.

Does anyone else ever feel like they find out so much more about other people after the fact? I do. I don't like that really one bit.

So much homework I need to catch up on. I have a job interview tomorrow FINALLY THANK YOU. I hope I get it. I could care less for waiting tables and faking nice but sometimes it's good.

Spring break ruled and summer can't come soon enough.

It's not something I would recommend but it is one way to live.,

Oh, Spring Break, you haven't killed me yet!
-Wrote a new song.
-Added more to my collage.
-finished my wicked ghetto thing I was knitting that turned out like turd.
-went on a man-venture with Craig to Plymouth the other day, visited Paul Henry at work.
OKAYYY


Got to shred the gnar at Scituate yesterday with Jon and John. Awesome fun, got to see Charlie/Brent. My knee doesn't feel totally better yet in regards to popping, but hill-bombing and cruising around/little tricks have been really fun. This weather is seriously so great! Some people get "seasonal depression." I think I have seasonal psyched-ness.

Today John and I drove down to Connecticut and dropped Sir. Nicholas Abela off. It was a fun long trip, especially not having left the state too recently. We drove through Hartford, which was pretty sketchy.

I really want to have a garden this year, grow up some tomatoes and potatoes. I should probably clear and area wahhh.

I'm not even close but I can't wait for summer. I can't wait to graduate, even though it's not until next December.


All these Earthquakes everywhere are gooning me out.
Stay safe, please.

This is the day Biggie died, too. Well, the 9th. Pay your respects.
RIP.

These thoughts are a jumble but so am I.
Goodnight.

Need laptop with SD card-slot badly.

Hard to BLOG if you don't have a computer.
Is anything going on this weekend?

I'm dying to play pool or a game of poker. I think that would be beneficial and more cost effective than bar-spending. From a financial standpoint, throwing down on a bottle of Whiskey and playing cards would seem the better option.

Here's a thought, if you're ever at a party and you over-hear a girl saying "Here's a picture of me in highschool...I look the same but I'm like 40 pounds heavier now" just bounce.

I want to go somewhere for Spring Break next week, cause thanks to Student Loan money I'm not Spring-Broke as usual. Any ideas would be nice.


Peace, son.

I went to college and never learned a thing, but found what I wanted between my skin and my ribs.

Cysts are the worst thing ever. I didn't believe Whitey, and now I'm paying for it because Karma rules. I got it drained and an incision the other day, totally gross. Hopefully I don't need crazy surgery, but I need to "wait to see if flares-up again" before I know if I do. Rad!

So many papers/tests due, and I'd rather not care about it.

I would rather it be Spring, no school, and be skateboarding and playing guitar, drinking and laughing with good friends. May, you can't come soon enough.

I want to do a full band project. I'm getting kind of sick of myself. I just don't really know who I'd do that with, you know?!

Also on my list are:
learning wood-work things.
finishing knitting my scarf.
going to the 4 1/5 house more.
finding a job.
writing more poems instead of songs.
turning my cell phone back on. (I swear.)

Spring-Break is coming up soon.
Late.

Valentine's Day.

Every Valentine's day people seem to do one of two things:

#1) They tell everyone about how in love they are with their significant other and how lucky they are to be with them via AIM away messages or Facebook status.

#2) People post about how much "Valentines day sucks it's totally a way to boost candy/flower/jewelery sales" and complain about being single.

Well, this year I'm single on Valentine's day. Last year I was too, but I still woke up next to someone (awkward). Many people being single on this day usually choose to participate in #2. While I can't blame them, being single on this day really isn't that bad. Instead of complaining about being single, I'd rather celebrate the love of my friends and family.

I've just started becoming closer with Mike and Rachel this past year, and they are two great friends who I really enjoy spending time with. They came to visit me over Winter break when I was living in Quincy with a busted leg, and not too many people did. Rachel has been in a few of my classes over the past few years, and Mike and I just really started talking this past Fall. Every time I play an Open Mike at the school they come and support me. They are two of the nicer people I've met at Bridgewater State College and I hope they realize how great of people they are.

Jim and Kathy are seriously two of the kindest people I've met. I've gone to their apartment quite a few times, and their hospitality is unparalleled. They love going out and having a few beers at Trivia Nights, or just taking it easy around the apartment. A few weeks ago, Kathy taught me how to knit! Jim gave John and myself 12 free pepperoni Mystic Pizza's! They are a handsome couple and anyone who has met them should be so lucky. I know I am.
My cousin Si and his wife Karyn are having a baby boy in about a month. Si was a tremendous influence on my early years, and I know he is going to be a great father. While I wish I got to spend more time with them this past year, I got to go to their cookout a few months ago and Baby shower last weekend. I hadn't seen Si for awhile up until last March. He called when Taylor and I were freezing in Weymouth and offered to basically come help us fix our lives. He helped us out with our car, helped Taylor do his taxes, and was just a great cousin. I can not wait to meet their baby boy, and I'm sure Avah and Tyler will enjoy someone else to play with!


I guess the point of this post is not to be upset that you are not in love on Valentine's day. I'm not a mother on Mother's Day, but I appreciate her and everything she has done on that particular day. Appreciate love on Valentine's day, even if you are not in the situation at the moment. Realize that love is all around you, and that you can be happy just being thankful for the people who surround you.

I have been in love, both on Valentine's day and not. And today it is pleasant enough to remember her after all the bullshit that happened. After all the "he said/she said", after the stupid fights and break-ups. It is nice to remember her love as something genuine in an otherwise bleak world. That I knew love and I knew it young. I hope she is happy today.

Hey, you can just drink Busch Diesels with your friends and still have a killer time.

OH MY GOD JAMIE LONG HAS (NO) POLITICAL VIEWS!

Jamie Long
2/4/10
COMM 364

Political Socialization

While never pledging allegiance to one particular party, after reading Denton & Kuypers chapter on “Political Socialization and the Formation of Political Attitudes”, it was hard not to draw some truth from it and look how my political views (or lack, thereof) were formed. Though I am still fairly open (perhaps even reckless) with my political beliefs, it was interesting to be able to apply some of Denton & Kuypers theories to those around me. My parents, very democratic in nature, may call my brothers, sisters, and myself all democrats. Though my siblings and I were raised with democratic beliefs, while hearing friends/professors/others political views, it is hard for me not to see other peoples points of view either. Factors that have prevented me from forming a political affiliation could be any of the following: rebellion, apathy, and kindness. It may seem strange to relate these three personal traits to my view on politics, it is very necessary. By the end of the semester, I hope to possibly try to be able to believe in something more concrete that I have been.
Firstly, I say rebellion because it is what goes through many minds while growing up. When told to do one thing, there is a very good chance the person may do the opposite. Being told that my family was democratic made me want to ask not only why we were democratic, but what are the other people’s views on the situation. I could not understand that I could be told I represented an entire party without knowing what the whole party represented. Many may call my some of my views democratic. Many may call me liberal, or even conservative or independent. I would choose none of these words because I only know how I feel about individual people’s situations, and not the entire scheme of things as a whole.
My apathy for politics may come from anything, but it seems that people are still fighting over the same things as they always have been and nothing is ever going to be solved. Many of the same issues yelled across the room from podiums have made throats sore for the past 100 years, and will continue to do so until long after I am gone. I’d hate even to relate all of this “important stuff” to a television show, but South Parks episode “Douche and Turd” seems make itself very relevant to me while I play it back in my head. The episode was aired before the 2004 presidential election, and asks the question of “Who would you rather have in office: a douche or a turd?” While I’m not specifically calling George W. Bush or John Kerry a douche or turd, I have never felt the urge to vote for any of the people who are presented to me. I have heard countless times “Well, I need to choose one, so I’m voting _____”. This just seems like nonsense to me, and I want no part of it. I’d rather have my views on certain situations than choose someone who I don’t fully agree with.
Lastly, I am brought to my own kindness. Many may view this as a great trait, but in the political world, it has done everything to prevent me from voting in a political campaign. I feel I understand what Flash to some major political issues: immigration, gay rights, abortion, the economy, and war. We could talk literally for hundreds of years about these situations (and we already have), but I am always swayed based on whoever I am talking to and understanding the situation they are in. I could ask myself whether I feel we should close off the borders to immigrants and try to fix our own problems before allowing others into the country, regardless of legality. Or I could ask myself: “Aren’t we America? Aren’t we supposed to take your ‘tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free’?” Are we supposed to not allow gays to marry because it is not traditional of Christian values, or should real, true love be recognized regardless of sex and gender? These are things that people have been fighting about for a long time, and I’m too much of a sissy to do fight one way or another. I thought I had some viewpoints, yet am sympathetic to anyone in a bad situation. I thought I had my views on abortion down: anyone who did not plan to be a parent shouldn’t be forced to be one, and can do whatever they’d like to with their own body. Then, my 17 year old sister got pregnant and I found how pro-life she was, even though she admitted she didn’t feel ready. Her views: What if something happens to me and I can’t ever bear a child again? And I totally can agree with her rationality, as my aunt was made barren. My sisters choices are her own, and I am not going to even talk about what she should do in that situation because I have never been in it.
To conclude, my rebellion, apathy, and kindness have helped me as much as hurt me from ever being able to tie myself to a political affiliation. I do love hearing about politics from my friends, family, and professors, because these are important issues that need to be talked about. I consider myself more of a listener than anything. Catch me on the right day and I could argue either way. Perhaps this is why I am a Communications major. I could get my point across in a speech and (not to toot my own horn) but probably convince you to listen to me, there is no questioning that. But in the back of my mind, I think of all of those people I have known who are in bad situations and that feel opposite on some political issues. Then I’m swayed and all mixed up again. Does this make me upset? Should being able to use persuasion however and whenever I want to for things I might not necessarily believe in bother me? Yes, it absolutely does. There are issues that need to be resolved, but I don’t feel this resolution will happen in my life-time. Legally, there will probably be some laws passed on these issues. However, morally, people will always be in different situations, and I understand this. All I can do is be sympathetic to my audience.

Marginal Friends.

Since I haven't had access to a computer with an SD card slot nor do I have a cable for my digital camera, I thought I would bless you all with a few pictures I've been doodling, titled "Marginal Friends"

Still Hasn't Called.

Getting Dicked Over.

Tree-cycle.

Brief skateboarding clips/good times/pictures of underage drinkers (oh and some of-age) coming soon!

Afterwards I swore that I would haunt you, now I'm way too tired to give a shit.

Days have kind of been blending together.
Past week, let's see...

Thursday, I started school again. Econ101 is straight, my teacher has gnarly dreads and I can only anticipate he will make the class not suck as bad as Econ101 probably should. Senior Seminar with Mickey should be okay too, I'm not looking forward to writing the 25 page paper but oh well, he's a nice dude. Intro to MGMT seems like it will be alright, Rachel is in the class so it's cool to have someone to talk to. Political Comm with JEdwards will have an epic paper, and though I don't care much for politics it will be cool to learn about them in the classroom. Plus, Jasons awesome.

After class I went up to Jim/Kathy's, where I was taught how to knit. I'm working on a scarf now. Pretty cool. Had a few man-sodas. Had a few man-sleeps.

Note: if you're chilling/grilling with a girl, be sure of what state you're in before thinking about making your move. If the next words to come out of your mouth are something along the lines of "Haha, hey, your lap-dog kind of reminds me of Patrick from SpongeBob", you're probably not straight. Just a thought.

At some point this weekend I tried to go skating with Jon/Jon/Brian/Charlie/Phil/some other random host of dudes at the Courthouse. Brought some flat rails, drank some Captains. I'll put pictures up later. It was fun.

On Monday J.P. scooped me up from Quasia and we came back to Dirty 'Vegas for a feast of treezza and pizza. Jim jumped down some stairs and had to go to the hospital to get his head checked out, so we went up to South Shore Hospital and grabbed the keys off him and Kathy to take the dogs for a walk. Just James and John and Jamie.

Tuesday had more class (see above) plus P.R. with Van Leuven. If it's anything like Intro to Org Comm, it will be fine. And Derek's in my class, so we'll be golden.

Left class, saw Eric and Pams new spot in Bryantville. Went to trivia with John/Jim/Kathy. We lost, endless bummer.



Oh well, pictures later.

bleakened weekend.

Okay so, Friday Steph Feeney and her friend stopped by, it was rad enough because Jon and I hadn't seen her in awhile. We went out to the quarries and it was really nice out.

Went back toDirty 'Vegas to Lindsay's house with Jon and Brian. Chris Black was out on the couch getting turkeyed with right when we got there. Overall, pretty good crowd.

And it was nice to see Lindsay, Keith, Brendan,and a whole host of random heads.
Stumbled into the bathroom and found Jon cold chillin' with Biz Markie.

Okay, so I went to Allston to Taylor's buddy Nicks house. Nick has repeated this scam countless times, but basically they call and order massive amounts of pizza from various pizza stores roughly 1 to`1 1/2 half hours before closing time. This given night, two different locations were hit for $117.00 orders. Then, the pizza companies are left with massive amounts of food that they don't take home at the end of the night, so they put them on top of their back recycling bins. We picked the orders up free of charge, they even had our fake name on the box.
Drank a few man-sodas and had mad pizza back at Nick's house in Allston. Woke up, saw the Chinese people who prowl the streets looking for cans, and gave them our empties.

Now, I'm watching Aziz Ansari's comedy special, after watching my roommate belt-buckle his girlfriend. Sunday Funday. Starting classes again Thursday, and looking for internships. More sometime later this week. Cheers.